Four Rooms
by TheSecretCity
Summary: In 'Exit Wounds', there were four bedrooms for seven agents. This was what happened on the first night in each. First Chapter is Morgan/Garcia,2nd is JJ/Em, 3rd is Rossi/Reid, 4th is Hotch/Jack. Now complete!
1. Airplanes

Airplanes

Alaska was cold. Derek Morgan was a Chicago boy-he knew cold. So scratch 'cold' and insert 'frigging freezing in the middle of summer in the lower 48' and that would be about right.

He had also agreed to take the floor-which was cold-and let Garcia have the bed in their room. It was better then sleeping in the same room as Hotch, and since there was only one bed per room…

Garcia came in as Morgan was arranging his collection of pillows and blankets on the floor. She had on a hugely pink terrycloth robe, green goo slathered all over her face, and hair in pigtails.

She was also gorgeous.

"Well, hello Baby Girl," he gave her a sexy growl. She tossed back her head and laughed.

"Does Lynch know I've got you up here in the wilds of Alaska all to myself?" he continued, just to see her keep smiling.

"Oh, I told him you were keeping your hands firmly to yourself," she teased back, and there it was, the banter he'd missed since she'd gotten with Lynch, full throttle in his face.

"Just my hands? But that leaves so many other possibilities."

"Are you going to tell me about some of those possibilities?"

"Why tell when I can demonstrate?"

She sashayed over to him, nose to nose. "Maybe you should."

"Yeah, but what if Lynch has you radared and figures out that I'm messing with his girl? One thing I learned from you was to not make a techie mad at me."

"Radared?" she started laughing. "Sweetie, there is no such word as radared."

"See? That's why you run the computers and I kick in doors. Division of labor."

"Well, let me tell you, big boy, I am not in any way wired so that Kevin ever knows what we were doing up here. What happens in Alaska stays up here with the polar bears."

"So if I just," and he dove, scooping her up so that she yelped and he was holding her like a bride. "And then I-" and he dumped her on the bed and fell on top of her. "Lynch would never know, eh?"

She twisted her fingers around his neck. They were still giggling. "No, my prince, he would never, ever find out that I finally gave in to your godlike charms."

"I am charming, aren't I?"

There was maybe three inches between their faces. Morgan was suddenly aware of everything, including the toothpaste on her breath.

"I, uh," he shifted off quickly.

She bit her lip.

"Sorry, Baby Girl."

She had very pert eyes, and they looked right at him.

"Derek, go ahead and take the bed," she stood up. "I have to do some more work, and I work best at night."

"Garcia-"

She looked him square in the eye, hardly embarrassed. "I'll kick your very fine backside out when I'm ready to turn in. After taking pictures, of course."

"Right."

She went back to wash off the green goo from her face. When she came out, Derek was getting comfortable on the floor.

"Derek Morgan, did I not just tell you to take a spell on the bed?"

He shrugged. "Baby, I'll wind up on the floor anyhow."

"You men are all so damn stupid."

She gave him an evil look and prepared to flounce off. He caught her arm.

"What's going on? And don't say 'nothing'. I'm a profiler and that's a lie."

She waved her hands. "Kevin doesn't like me in the field with you guys. We had a fight just before I left."

"I'm sorry." In the back of his mind he was remembering Prentiss's advice: Shut up and listen.

"Yeah, the neighbors said they didn't call the cops because we were the FBI. Imagine being an agent and having the police show up for domestic disturbance."

"Are things okay between you and him now, or?…"

"I called him earlier. He apologized for yelling. I apologized for throwing the vase at him. He said he wouldn't ever yell like that again. I told him not if he expected to keep his wiener working. And the fact that I said that scared me so bad I hung up really quick."

"You threatened to go after Little Willie?"

"Why do guys name their wankers?"

"Why do women name their, um-"

"Boobs, Derek. They're called boobs."

"The last time I used that word I was twelve and my mom smacked me so hard I saw stars. I will never use that word again. Mom will come out of the woodwork and kill me for sure if I do."

She laughed. "But I guess Kevin and I are okay."

"Okay. Cause if you're not, I'm good at breaking down doors and scaring the hell out of people."

She punched his shoulder. "Use the bed, Morgan. Or I'll go after you're Little Willie. Better yet, I'll call Fran and tell her you used the word 'boobs'."

"That is just not cool, Baby Girl."

On her way out the door, she was briefly haloed by the warm lights of the hallway. Closing his eyes, he tried to go to sleep.

Author's Note: This set of oneshots is all based on 'Exit Wounds', and the day it aired was also the first time I heard 'Airplanes' by B O B and Haley of Paramour, so they got all linked up in my head. They all take place on the first night, before Garcia catches the unsub leaving a body in the front lawn.


	2. Shooting Stars

Shooting Stars

They were all used to having their own hotel rooms. Except for Garcia and Morgan, no one was sure how they should go about sharing. There were regulations about agents sharing a room, much less the twin bed in each one.

There was a brief debate after their tech and her teddy bear left. Three rooms open, five people.

And no one had bothered to look at Hotch to see if he would share. He was the Boss.

"No offense, kid," Rossi was telling Reid. "The only way I'm sharing a room with you is if I get earplugs."

"What?" Reid demanded. "I'm not that loud. I don't think I am, anyway. And you probably snore worse anyhow."

"It's not the snoring. It's the talking in your sleep that keeps me up."

"I don't talk in my sleep. Do I?"

"JJ and I can share," Emily piped up. Rossi gave her a dirty look.

"What?" she asked politely.

"I will get you, Emily Prentiss."

She gave him her best 'come and get me, bitch' look.

"Hotch!" Reid appealed behind them. "Do I talk in my sleep?"

Hotch sighed. "Reid, if anyone needs to pass an chemistry or math exam, all they need to do is listen to you talk in your sleep."

"Oh."

"And you thought I was kidding," Rossi turned his glare to Reid. Reid stuck his tongue out. Rossi returned to favor.

"Do I need to assign rooms based on the mental ages of the people in this room?" Hotch demanded.

"YES!" was Reid and Rossi's response, neck and neck with Emily and JJ's "NO!"

"Fine," Hotch decided. "JJ, you and Emily set up. Rossi, I don't want to hear it. This is Alaska. Get earmuffs from someone. Good night."

"How come you don't have to share?" Rossi demanded as Hotch ascended the stairs.

Emily and JJ giggled as one of Hotch's shoes flew down behind him and narrowly missed Rossi.

"Bad question, Rossi," JJ teased. "Night boys."

"Don't stay up too late talking," Emily added as they raced up the stairs behind Hotch, passed him in the hall, and locked themselves in a room with hastily gathered go bags.

"Poor Rossi," JJ snickered.

"Rossi? Poor Reid," Emily said. "Rossi might kill him before tonight's over. When we have to pair off on stakeouts Morgan always stays with Reid."

"Yeah," JJ agreed. "But on the upside…"

"Slumber party," Emily finished. "Even if we are two female professionals in our thirties on a business assignment."

"And without Garcia."

"Who needs to dump high tech boy toy for a more athletic version."

"I'm taking bets on when that happens."

"Why?"

"Because they've been fighting more and more lately."

"Oh God."

"Yeah. The sweet smell of impending breakup."

Emily pulled out an old USMC sweatshirt. "How's Henry doing?"

"Okay. Ex-boyfriend?"

"What? Oh," Emily blushed as she began to change clothes. "Yeah. I liked the shirt more then him."

"I see," JJ pulled out her own sleepwear, a silky blue set that matched her eyes perfectly. "Have you ever thought about going out with Reid?"

Emily stripped off her pants and reached for her sleep shorts. "With Reid? Have you ever-"

"I went to a football game with him. It was a little awkward."

"Geeky pauses?"

"It's hard to know what to say when your date to a football game is talking about the chemical composition of hot dogs and has no idea what team is playing."

"If I liked football, that would be awkward."

They had finished changing and crawled into the bed together, lights still on. "I know way too much about sports to deal with a guy who doesn't. I mean, every guy I know knows sports. He just doesn't seem like a guy, not knowing."

"Not your kind of guy, anyway."

"Exactly. So maybe you and he… I know he's younger the you-"

"JJ, the guys my age are in three categories-married, too ugly to be married, or too rude to stay married. I'll shot younger. But only if you shot older."

"What do you mean?"

Emily raised her eyebrows. "If I shared a room with Reid, who would you be left with?"

JJ slapped her friend's arm. "Have you seen his little black book? It's not little. It's the size of the Encyclopedia Britannica."

"So? When was his last entry in it?"

"One-nighter, casual date, fling, or long-term relationship?" "Never mind."

"Trust me, if Will every makes up his damn mind to go and stay gone, which I hope he does shortly, I'd have a better chance with Hotch then with Rossi."

"That's a thought."

"What?"

"You and Hotch."

"Em?"

"Mm-hm."

"Shut up before I tell Rossi you had a crush on him when you joined the Bureau."

"That was very low, Jennifer Jareau."

"Night."

"Night."

JJ flicked off their single lamp.

Author's Note: I had already planned on how I wanted each chapter to go when I started-i.e., who shared with whom-but lolyncut asked if Reid and Prentiss could share a room. This was my attempt to work it in and still have all my planned pairs work out. Review?


	3. Night Sky

Night Sky

One bed. Two agents.

The only saving grace about that was that if Strauss ever found out, she'd drop dead of a massive coronary right there, eyes rolling back in her head.

No way could he ask Reid to sleep on the floor. Just because he slept in the most uncomfortable positions known to man and a few Reid himself had invented didn't mean he had to.

And no way in hell was Rossi taking to floor. He was old. One day he'd get arthritis if he wasn't careful, according to his doctor.

If it was Hotch, it would be easy. They'd each take a side and stay there. But Reid-he knew from stakeouts with Morgan-was a snuggler. A very persistent, sound sleeping snuggler.

With puppy dog eyes.

"I'll take the floor," Reid offered.

Rossi shook a hand at him. "We're both adults. We can share a mattress without being embarrassed."

Reid twitched his face in that special way he had. "I'll try to be quiet."

"If I hit you with a pillow, that's a sign that you're too loud," Rossi agreed. "Left or right?"

"What?"

"Which side of the bed do you like?"

"Um, either."

"Good. An ambidextrous sleeper. I get the left side. You get the right."

"Okay."

Reid went into the bathroom, and Rossi striped down to his boxers and undershirt. When Reid came out it was in a set of flannel pajamas that looked three sizes too big, taking another ten years off his age. And they were covered in Superman logos.

Reid looked at his bare feet. "We've never had to share rooms," he explained.

"Where did you buy that atrocity against sleepwear?"

"Wal-Mart."

Rossi nodded. "When we get back to civilization, I'm taking you shopping. Lack of style is an option, but this is just a lack of knowledge. Much as I never thought I'd speak of that and you in the same sentence."

"They were the only ones in my size. It was a sale."

Reid reminded him of an awkward ten-year-old.

"No more sale shopping," Rossi informed him. "Not if that's what happens."

"I don't usually. But I needed something warm for up here-"

"Definitely taking you shopping when we get back," Rossi motioned to the other side of the bed as he crawled under the covers, feeling old.

Reid hesitated, then climbed in, pulling a book from his bag as he went.

"Reid-" Rossi warned as he settled in. "DO NOT leave that light on reading. We both need to sleep."

"Just a few minutes, I promise."

"What are you reading?"

Reid rattled off a title in Italian. Rossi had no idea what he'd said.

"That's nice." Rossi decided.

Reid was blessedly quiet after that, only turning pages with metronomic precision. It was almost relaxing. Not like car trips with books on tape. If all it took to occupy Reid was a thick book…

"Rossi?"

"Hm?"

"How do you know if a girl likes you?"

"Isn't that a question for Morgan?"

"Probably."

Reid was quiet again.

"Reid, if a girl likes you, she tries to talk to you. She might touch your arm if she's bold. She will listen attentively to everything that you say. And she won't take your head off if you're having a bad day."

"Oh."

"Kind of like how Emily is around you."

"JJ's right. Profilers suck."

That made Rossi laugh. "Just because we knew about Will before she did. Nothing personal."

"If that's not personal, I'd hate to see what is."

Reid put his book away and reached for the light.

"And kid?" "Yeah?"

"Try to stay on your side. I feel a warm body, and I start putting my hands in places they shouldn't be."

The light clicked off. "I so did not need to hear that, Rossi."

"Just saying."

"Only because that's what Morgan says about me."

Damn. Now that would be permanently in his head-Reid and Morgan, side by side asleep, and Morgan waking up with Reid's hands somewhere they should.

Damn kid.

Author's Note: There are no men's size Superman flannel pjs at Wal-Mart. I should know. It's my other home.


	4. Wish Right Now

Wish Right Now

Hotch sighed as JJ and Prentiss surged past hi into their room, go bags flying. After he'd locked himself inside his own room, he heard Rossi and Reid coming up at a much more adult pace.

He put his head in his hands and tried to calculate the time difference between Alaska and Virginia. He should have asked Reid. Was it four hours ahead or behind?

He gave up, pulled out his satellite phone, and called his apartment.

"Is that you, Aaron?" it was Haley's sister Jessica, still at his place.

"Yeah. I don't even know what time it is there. Is Jack still up?"

"Do you even have to ask?" he heard her call behind. "Jack, do you want to talk to your Daddy?"

God, Jess sounded just like Haley. One day she would call and he'd call her by her dead sister's name.

"Daddy?" it was Jack.

"Hey buddy. How are you?"

"Aunt Jess made hamburgers for dinner!"

"Oh, I bet those were good."

"Uh-huh. Did you get the bad guy yet?"

"No, not yet."

"You will," Jack said with the supreme confidence of a four year old. "Do I have to go to school?"

"What?" Jack's conversation usually followed a logical sequence.

"Aunt Jess says I have to go to school because I'll be five."

"Well, when you _are_ five, you get to go to kindergarten," Hotch began carefully.

"But I don't want to go to school."

"Why not? School can be fun. Sometimes. Most of the time," he did a mental head smack. He was gibbering, and setting a bad example for Jack.

"I don't think I like school. There's a lot of people, and teachers tell you what to do, and it's loud. I've seen schools on TV, Daddy. They look really, really loud."

"Well, school can be loud, because of all the people walking and talking. But you make friends, too, and there's a lot of fun parts about school."

"Did you like school?"

Tell the truth or a lie?

"Honestly, Jack, I hated school. Until I went to college."

"Why?"

"Well," Because my dad was a drunk who beat the hell out of me and I looked like a geek and never played sports because I usually hurt from the last beating he'd given and I had to protect my idiot brother from the idiot bullies and his harebrained friends and about a thousand others things you don't need to know, baby.

"Well," he cleared his throat. "I didn't have friends."

"You didn't have friends? You have, like, a bazillion friends now."

"But I didn't in school."

"Did Uncle Sean have a lot of friends?"

A lot of friend who dealt pot, yeah. "I spent a lot of time keeping Sean from doing something dumb with his friends."

"Oh," that was a 'wisdom of the ages' oh. Not good.

"And I didn't try to make friends, either."

"Why not, Daddy?"

Because my dad was a drunk. "I didn't want to take anyone home."

"Why?"

The perpetual question. He'd have to answer. "Because my daddy was very mean to Sean and me, and I didn't want anyone to know."

"Really bad?"

"Yeah."

They were both quiet for a minute.

"I guess I'll go to school, then," Jack announced.

That threw Hotch for a loop. "Why'd you change your mind?"

"Well, if you didn't like school because your daddy was mean, but my daddy's nice-that's you, Daddy-then I'll make lots of friends because I won't mind bringing them home to play. So I'll like school."

"Good." Crisis averted.

"When can I go to school?"

Hotch chuckled. "When your five."

"When will I be five?"

"You will be five in May."

"Can I go to school in May?"

"No."

"But Daddy, you said I could!"

"But school doesn't start until September. So you have to wait until September to go to school."

"Not fair. I want to go to school in May."

"Well, maybe we can start doing some learning before you go to school."

"Really? Will you teach me how to read?"

"How about I teach you all the letters first?"

"And numbers, too, okay? I want to learn numbers."

"Okay buddy. Numbers and letters."

"Will we start when you come home?"

"Yes. But we can start right now."

"We can? Really?"

"Yep. Get a piece of paper and a crayon."

"Okay Daddy. I gotta put you on the table."

"Okay. Don't forget me!"

A few minutes later Jack was back. "Okay. You know how to make shapes? Triangles?"

"Yes."

"Okay. Make the two sides of a triangle but not the bottom."

He could imagine Jack's tongue out with concentration. "I did it."

"Now, up near the point, draw a line to connect the sides, like a bottom but way up."

"Did it."

"Know what you just made?"

"What?"

"The letter 'A'."

"Really?"

"Yep. The first letter in the alphabet."

"How many letters are there?"

"Twenty-six."

"And I know one."

"Only twenty-five more to go."

"Cool!"

Hotch stifled a yawn. "I need to go to bed now, buddy."

Jack giggled. "It's too early."

"Not here it isn't. Here it's dark as it can be."

"Why?"

Jack's favorite question. "Because the earth spins."

"Wow."

"When I come home, I'll show you on Mommy's globe why it's dark here but morning in Africa."

"Okay. Night Daddy."

"Good night, buddy. Love you. Give Aunt Jess a hug from me."

"Love you too, Daddy."

And with the wonderful abruptness of a child, he hung up.

Hotch sighed deeply and laid out on the top of his bed, vainly chasing sleep, noticing that the stars were brilliant outside, and that maybe he and Jack could take a trip up to Alaska someday, just the two of them. No cells phones to call him back to work.

"Wish you were here, Haley. We miss you. Let me know how I'm doing, okay? Love you, sweetheart."

He spoke to the air.

Outside, a shooting star streaked across the sky and disappeared into the mountains.

Author's Note: LONGEST CHAPTER EVER that I've posted. Woot! Review?


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